Massage

I have received as many as a dozen forms of massage during the past 15 years. I credit massage with keeping my body healthy and flexible and my attitudes youthful and forward looking. In addition I have received training in five massage forms and employ them as needed with clients.

My earliest formal massage training was at the Body Electric School in Oakland, California. Of course, I had been trained in various erotic massage techniques in Body Electric workshops both before and after the formal training. The formal training in the traditional “Swedish” massage established my basic massage techniques. This form of massage involves several strokes, often with French names (effleurage, petrassage, etc.) If you are wondering about French names in Swedish massage, the truth is that this form of massage was actually an American invention. At the time it was being developed in California, Sweden was considered to be the wildest, sexually free place on earth and they gave the massage that name to make it attractive. Swedish massage concentrates on long gliding strokes, punctuated by kneading, percussion, vibration, and stretching. If you have received a massage in the US you are likely to have encountered Swedish massage.

After several years of giving and receiving massage I chose Leslie Bruder (see photo above) as a massage therapist. Leslie had originated a unique modality that she called Phenomenal Touch. This massage technique involves working simultaneously on both sides of the body, which is accomplished by using the therapist’s legs, body, and to a limited extent, arms to raise the client up off the table. How this is accomplished without requiring superhuman strength is too complicated to go into here, but it can be done without significant effort and can be maintained with both hands being free to do the massage. Working both sides of the body significantly increases the depth of the massage without causing discomfort to the client. I was amazed and appreciative of what Leslie was able to do and wanted to incorporate it in my own work. I began taking short, day-long training sessions, followed by a week-long training in a remote area of Mexico. The following year, Leslie asked me to be one of her assistants for the Mexico training and I also served as an assistant in the first Institute for Phenomenal Touch Massage, a yearlong training that is now in its fourth year.

Leslie Bruder is also an expert in hot stone massage and blends it with her own techniques. I studied and received hot stone massage during all the time I was studying with Leslie. In this modality smooth basalt stones are heated in water and applied to the body using massage oil to keep them from sticking. The stones may be left in one position, but in Leslie’s method, she uses them as massage tools, moving them over large areas of the body before leaving them in one position when they have cooled to a comfortable temperature. A hot stone massage can be a mystical, other worldly experience that has to be experienced to be appreciated.

In the yearlong Institute for Phenomenal Touch Massage two other modalities were introduced and basic techniques were taught. The Trager Approach, which was invented by Milton Trager in the 1940s, is a called “movement education” by Trager International. The instructor made it very clear that we were NOT being taught the Trager method, just being introduced to certain fundamental ideas. In this modality the therapist senses the natural rhythm of the body or body part by placing her hands on the part and “listening” with the touch. Gradually that natural rhythm is sensed and can be gently amplified by rocking and vibrating the body part. Great sensitivity is required to make sure that one isn’t just inserting one’s own rhythm into the process. In the hands of an expert the Trager work is extremely relaxing and freeing to the body. I took very easily to this approach and could get “in sync” with the body I was touching and begin to move it effortlessly. While I would never pretend that I was a Trager practitioner, I use the basic techniques I learned as a part of my tools.

The second modality that was introduced is Watsu, a water-based massage technique. Watsu is a gentle massage and stretching technique that is performed in a pool of warm water. The receiver is continuously supported while being floated, cradled, rocked and stretched. The deeply relaxing effects of warm water and nurturing support, combine with Watsu's movements, stretches, massage and point work, to create a bodywork with a range of therapeutic benefits and potential healing on many levels. While I enjoyed receiving Watsu and learned the basic techniques, I have never used them since because of the requirements of a large pool of very warm water.

Those are the five forms of massage in which I have received training. In addition I have received many other modalities, including acupressure, lomilomi, myofascial release, shiatsu, and trigger point massage. I will not attempt to describe these modalities, but you can Google them and get more information.

War in Iran?

A headline in my morning newspaper, The Santa Fe New Mexican, reads: "Report: Covert activity in Iran to widen." On all sides I am reading disturbing comments about the plans of our government (read the Bush administration acting unilaterally) to invade Iran before the end of the current administration. Here is what Israeli Prime Minister Ehud Olmert said following his 90-minute meeting at the White House with President Bush on 4 June:

“We reached agreement on the need to take care of the Iranian threat. I left with a lot less question marks [than I had entered with] regarding the means, the timetable restrictions, and American resoluteness to deal with the problem.

“George Bush understands the severity of the Iranian threat and the need to vanquish it, and intends to act on that matter before the end of his term in the White House.”

Forewarned is forearmed. We may be into a war before we know about it and without even a pro forma approval by the congress. Watch out, friends. Let's not let them do it again. We desperately need for the citizenry of this country to stand up to the criminal activities of our government. There is nothing better than an informed citizenry to start making democracy work again. Pass the word along.

Here is a New York Review of Books article on the subject. Click Here.

Herbs, Oils, and Crystals

I regularly take a number of herbal supplements. I’ve used some form of saw palmetto preparation for many years to keep my prostate happy. I take a mixture of slippery elm bark, DGL, and plant enzymes with every meal to aid digestion. Before I started with this supplement I was on the little “purple pill” (Nexium), which has dire long-term side effects. By taking this herbal preparation I have quit the prescription drug entirely. Is there any wonder why the drug companies keep trying to get legislation passed to outlaw all supplements? Their excuse is that the medical benefits of supplements are unproven and they haven’t been checked out for safety. Well, what about the safety of prescription drugs? I appreciate their concern for my health, but I’ll continue to make my own medical decisions as long as I can.

Essential oils are another part of my personal medicine chest. I use tea tree oil (melaleuca alternifolia) as a disinfectant for cuts, scratches and the like. I also take one drop by mouth every minute at the first sign of a sore throat. After about 15 minutes I space it out until the cold symptoms are gone. I’ve been able to avoid many colds this way. It is very important that you get the highest quality oil if you are going to take even a drop or two internally. I will use Young Living or Jurlique oils internally, but prefer to get my essential oils from dealers who work directly with the people who distill them. Essential oils should be distilled using water, not steam or other chemicals. Cheaper oils are distilled with steam or chemicals because they can get more oil out of the plant that way, but with a decrease in the quality.

Another wonderful essential oil is frankincense oil (Boswellia sacra), made from the same resin that is often burned as incense. Frankincense oil relieves muscle spasm and other inflammation problems and it is often used to treat asthma, although I haven’t tried that. Again, you will need to make sure you are getting high quality oil. There is a huge range of quality and you need to know your source.

As for crystals, there is much literature on the healing properties of crystals, but I haven’t found them to be effective for me. I like crystals and own several that I enjoy looking at. Elyn bought me a beautiful double terminated enhydro quartz crystal for my birthday this year. If you look very carefully you can see two tiny air bubbles in separate water capsules. They will move as you rotate the crystal. Fascinating.

Tai Chi

I am a regular student of tai chi, currently learning the so-called short form.

The National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine (NCCAM) defines Tai Chi as follows:

Tai chi developed in China in about the 12th century A.D. It started as a martial art, or a practice for fighting or self-defense, usually without weapons. Over time, people began to use tai chi for health purposes as well. Many different styles of tai chi, and variations of each style, developed. The term "tai chi" has been translated in various ways, such as "internal martial art," "supreme ultimate boxing," "boundless fist," and "balance of the opposing forces of nature." While accounts of tai chi's history often differ, the most consistently important figure is a Taoist monk (and semi-legendary figure) in 12th-century China named Chang San-Feng (or Zan Sanfeng). Chang is said to have observed five animals--tiger, dragon, leopard, snake, and crane--and to have concluded that the snake and the crane, through their movements, were the ones most able to overcome strong, unyielding opponents. Chang developed an initial set of exercises that imitated the movements of animals. He also brought flexibility and suppleness in place of strength to the martial arts, as well as some key philosophical concepts.

A person practicing tai chi moves her body in a slow, relaxed, and graceful series of movements. One can practice on one's own or in a group. The movements make up what are called forms (or routines). Some movements are named for animals or birds, such as "White Crane Spreads Its Wings." The simplest style of tai chi uses 13 movements; more complex styles can have dozens.

In tai chi, each movement flows into the next. The entire body is always in motion, with the movements performed gently and at uniform speed. It is considered important to keep the body upright, especially the upper body-many tai chi practitioners use the image of a string that goes from the top of the head into the heavens-and to let the body's weight sink to the soles of the feet.

In addition to movement, two other important elements in tai chi are breathing and meditation In tai chi practice, it is considered important to concentrate; put aside distracting thoughts; and breathe in a deep, relaxed, and focused manner. Practitioners believe that this breathing and meditation have many benefits, such as:

* Massaging the internal organs.
* Aiding the exchange of gases in the lungs.
* Helping the digestive system work better.
* Increasing calmness and awareness.
* Improving balance.


Tai chi seems to have been spared the snide comments of the medical community for the “proposed vital energy” of chi and the opposing yin and yang forces. It would seem to be fertile territory for them to snort at. Perhaps its foreign origin keeps the hounds at bay. Or, more likely, tai chi is not seen as a “healing” modality and no competition for their monopoly on the health care dollar.

I first began learning tai chi around ten years ago, but somehow the practice didn’t work for me and I dropped it. In the past year I’ve been with a wonderful teacher, Steven Jen, here in Santa Fe and seem to be progressing much better. I go to a class once each week and try to practice some in between. The class always begins with warm ups, which consist of focusing the breath on the lower abdomen (dantien), simple movements to increase flexibility, and movements designed to enhance balance. We then continue to the short form itself. I am very close to finishing learning the short form. When I have it learned I can continue to do it when we move away from Santa Fe.

To me, tai chi combines exercise and meditation. Even as I am learning the short form I find every tai chi session gives me feelings of relaxation and well-being.

Homeland Insecurity

Wow! What a harvest of wisdom from our federal government today. I can hardly wait for the sequels. Today I learned that our supreme court ruled that the second amendment to the constitution (the right to bear arms) applies to handguns in an urban setting, thus striking down many city’s attempts to control violence in their streets. Simultaneously, I learn that laptop computers are being confiscated at airports in the US and sometimes not returned for long periods of time. So, now my laptop is a threat to national security, but your handgun isn’t. Amazing!

Within an hour I learn of the story of a dog named “Blast.” Blast’s owners were traveling abroad and they called home to ask the dog sitter if Blast was OK. Enter Homeland Security in the form of a telephone call asking if they had made such a call on such and such a date. The people thought at first that it was some kind of joke, but the federal agent assured them that the government was deadly serious and they were suspects. My friend, Judi, assures me that this is not an urban legend—that she had heard it directly from the folks it happened to.

Don’t you feel more secure hearing all this? Is this a great country or what?

Cranialsacral Work

I’ve just returned from a treatment with my cranialsacral person, Andrew, so this will be a good time to describe this alternative therapy.

Following the path I’ve taken with other alternatives I begin with the Wikipedia definition:

Craniosacral therapy (also called CST, cranial osteopathy, also spelled CranioSacral bodywork or therapy) is a method of Complementary and alternative medicine used by physical therapists, massage therapists, naturopaths, chiropractors and osteopaths. A craniosacral therapy session involves the therapist placing their hands on the patient, which they state allows them to tune into what they call the craniosacral system. By gently working with the spine, the skull and its cranial sutures, diaphragms, and fascia, the restrictions of nerve passages are said to be eased, the movement of CSF through the spinal cord can be optimized, and misaligned bones are said to be restored to their proper position. Craniosacral therapists use the therapy to treat mental stress, neck and back pain, migraines, TMJ Syndrome, and for chronic pain conditions such as fibromyalgia.

If that sounds tentative and doubtful to you try this quote from a website with the title “Why Cranialsacral Therapy is Silly," written by one Stephen Barrett, M.D.

I do not believe that craniosacral therapy has any therapeutic value. Its underlying theory is false because the bones of the skull fuse by the end of adolescence and no research has ever demonstrated that manual manipulation can move the individual cranial bones [10]. Nor do I believe that "the rhythms of the craniosacral system can be felt as clearly as the rhythms of the cardiovascular and respiratory systems," as is claimed by another Upledger Institute brochure [11]. The brain does pulsate, but this is exclusively related to the cardiovascular system [12], and no relationship between brain pulsation and general health has been demonstrated.

A few years ago, three physical therapists who examined the same 12 patients diagnosed significantly different "craniosacral rates," which is the expected outcome of measuring a nonexistent phenomenon [13]. Another study compared the "craniosacral rate" measured at the head and feet of 28 adults by two examiners and found that the results were highly inconsistent [14].

In 1999, after doing a comprehensive review of published studies, the British Columbia Office of Health Technology Assessment (BCOHTA) concluded that the theory is invalid and that practitioners cannot reliably measure what they claim to be modifying. The 68-page report concludes that "there is insufficient evidence to recommend craniosacral therapy to patients, practitioners, or third party payers." [15]

In 2002, two basic science professors at the University of New England College of Osteopathic Medicine concluded:

Our own and previously published findings suggest that the proposed mechanism for cranial osteopathy is invalid and that interexaminer (and, therefore, diagnostic) reliability is approximately zero. Since no properly randomized, blinded, and placebo-controlled outcome studies have been published, we conclude that cranial osteopathy should be removed from curricula of colleges of osteopathic medicine and from osteopathic licensing examinations [10].

I certainly agree! In fact, I believe that most practitioners of craniosacral therapy have such poor judgment that they should be delicensed.

Notice that this M.D. would forbid the teaching of craniosacral therapy and that anyone who practices it should be delicensed. He would, in effect, make it impossible for me to choose to spend my money for such therapy. Now for my experience with the modality.

I’ve had craniosacral therapy on and off for approximately four years. I’ve experienced enough benefits that I continue to avail myself of it on a fairly regular basis. I’m sure that my experiences would be labeled as placebo effect by the scientific establishment, but I don’t really care how they label my experiences, only that they are not successful in outlawing all alternative therapies and forcing all of us to come only to them to spend our money for health care.

Today I showed up at Andrew’s office and, after some brief conversation about my proposed exercise program based on the methods of Pete Egoscue (another alternative), which Andrew had recommended to me for consideration, I lay on his table and he began to hold and gently manipulate my head. The effect is quite soporific and I drifted near sleep. After some time, Andrew left the room and I continued to lie there. After several minutes he returned and said that he had detected a marked increase in the activity of my right brain and he wondered what I had done to effect this change. I described my completion of my little book, Pebbles, and my beginning of this blog. It is clear to me that my excitement about these events had, indeed, made a significant change in my functioning and I believe that Andrew had detected the changes. When I left Andrew’s office I experienced some feelings of disassociation and I am taking it easy for the rest of the day. This is the usual result of an appointment with Andrew.

Is this some kind of “double-blind” study that will prove scientifically that I had a change in brain functioning and that Andrew had detected it? Not at all. I am simply reporting my experience and I am quite satisfied with spending some of my money in this way. My hope is that the scientific turf watchers won’t be successful in trying to shut all my alternative therapies down.

REMEMBER: the medical establishment and the drug companies are NOT in business to sustain our health.

Homeopathy

Continuing with my thread about alternative health care I’ve explored, we come to the venerable modality of homeopathy. My usual source of online misinformation, Wikipedia, defines homeopathy as follows:

Homeopathy (also homœopathy or homoeopathy; from the Greek ὅμοιος, hómoios, "similar" + πάθος, páthos, "suffering" or "disease") is a form of alternative medicine first defined by Samuel Hahnemann in the 18th century. Homeopathic practitioners contend that an ill person can be treated using a substance that can produce, in a healthy person, symptoms similar to those of the illness. According to homeopaths, serial dilution, with shaking between each dilution, removes the toxic effects of the remedy while the qualities of the substance are retained by the diluent (water, sugar, or alcohol). The end product is often so diluted that it is indistinguishable from pure water, sugar or alcohol. Practitioners select treatments according to a patient consultation that explores the physical and psychological state of the patient, both of which are considered important to selecting the remedy.

Elyn and I have used over-the-counter homeopathic products for about ten years now, with good results. We have used arnica montana for pain, coffea cruda for sleeplessness, homeopathic mineral salts for a variety of complaints, and NoJetLag for long travel. In spite of our favorable response to these substances, the scientific point of view tells us:

Claims for efficacy of homeopathic treatment beyond the placebo effect are unsupported by the collective weight of scientific and clinical evidence. Common homeopathic preparations are diluted beyond the point where there is any likelihood that molecules from the original solution are present in the final product; the claim that these treatments still have any pharmacological effect is thus scientifically implausible and violates fundamental principles of science, including the law of mass action.

So much for what the scientists say. The short version is that homeopathy is quack medicine. In the past year I have been seeing a classical homeopath who conducted extensive interviews covering aspects of my life and being that I had never been asked about. Based on those interviews she prescribed a single homeopathic remedy that I take daily. This remedy is in a dropper bottle. I place one drop under my tongue each day. Here is the response so far.

The first remedy that I received resulted in severe depression within a few days. The homeopath quickly gave me another and the results, while not as dramatic, are profound. I have noticed a gradual improvement in chronic symptoms such as acid reflux, sudden depletion of energy, depression, etc. I believe that this remedy accounts for the general improvement in my quality of life that has resulted in our plans to travel and live abroad for a few years. All this may just be placebo effect, but I don’t care what you call it. I am enjoying a wonderful quality of life and homeopathy is a significant part of it.

Bisexuality

An anonymous reader of this blog has asked for more information about my sexual orientation. My brief response was that I had written about that in my book, Pebbles: Memories of a Small-Town Kansas Boy. However, I’ll give a brief synopsis here.

In the swinging 1970s I fully embraced the idea of open marriage, having multiple partners, mostly among the spouses of friends. This life style put me into sexual threesomes from time to time and it was in those relationships that I discovered that my sexual interest was not limited to women. In the middle 1990s, having left my 32-year marriage and retired from a 28-year career as a university professor, I decided to explore that aspect of my being. I started seeing a gay therapist and joined a gay man’s group that he was leading. Little by little I overcame my feelings of shame and uncertainty at my sexual orientation and, when the therapist recommended a workshop held by the Body Electric School of Oakland, California I jumped at the chance.

Body Electric School is a long-standing operation that was started in the height of the AIDS epidemic in the Bay Area. Two gay men began to teach workshops for other men to show them how to have a safe erotic life. The idea grew from there until in the 1990s the school was offering short and long workshops for both men and women, workshops for men and women together, and a massage school where one could become a certified massage therapist.

The first weekend workshop in Minneapolis, MN was eye opening for me. I found myself in the presence of a group of 30-or-so men who were also exploring a safe erotic life with other men. Most of the men were clearly identified as gay, but a few of us were on the fence. I felt totally welcomed by the others in the group, with only a few men expressing doubts at my not fully embracing the gay lifestyle. I came home from this workshop ecstatic and couldn’t wait to explore further. Over the next few years I attended many Body Electric events, including a week-long retreat on the big island of Hawaii and two workshops at Wildwood, the retreat center operated by the school, for both men and women. (Wildwood has since become an independent organization but continues to offer Body Electric trainings.)

At one of these trainings a leader was talking about being a “useful” person in our home communities. When I thought about that idea I immediately saw that one way for me would be to become a massage therapist. I came home and discussed this with my wonderful partner, Elyn, and she said “Do it.” Body Electric School had a massage training beginning the next week and I applied and was accepted. I have been practicing massage now for over ten years and have never taken a fee for my services. I’ve had several careers in my life and I didn’t want another.

That is a brief synopsis of my journey to date. Perhaps more will come up later in the course of other writings.

More On Hellerwork

This is a followup to the previous posting on my experience with Hellerwork.

When Elyn and I were walking the 500-mile pilgrimage across Spain in 1997 I had trouble with my left hip. I was carrying a rather heavy pack every day and walking most of the time. Somewhere along the road I found that my left hip simply locked up and wouldn’t move. Very painful. I gave it rest and it was relieved. My doctor told me that I would soon be a candidate for a hip replacement, since there was permanent damage to the joint that would only get worse.

While I was seeing the Hellerworker to resolve the frozen right shoulder she did a careful examination of how I was walking and determined that my tendency to throw the left foot outward was exerting a rotation on the hip, which was causing the irritation. She did very deep work on the left leg and gave me strict instructions about how to change my gait when walking. At first I had to be constantly aware of the new gait, which involved concentrating on my feet being aimed more or less straight forward. After several months the new gait became habitual and the Hellerwork treatments changed the organization of the system. The hip problems went away and have never returned even though we have walked long distance trails in France in recent years. I could have had a hip replacement by now and be suffering the long-term effects of that artificial device. I’m very thankful that I opted for the “bogus” treatment instead of the “scientific” treatment.

Those Commandments

I had made a mental note to write a posting on the ten commandments, so I downloaded the most pervasive online source of misinformation, Wikipedia, on the subject. Imagine my surprise when I learned that the same passages from the Hebrew Bible (Exodus 20:2-17 and Deuteronomy 5:6-21) are interpreted in different ways by the Jews, Anglicans, Orthodox, and Roman Catholics. They can’t even agree on the numbering. How can I write an agnostic piece about the ten commandments if I can’t even refer to them by number? To make matters even more complicated, the Muslims have a completely different set of ten commandments. To be sure, all sets make considerable reference to “man’s duty to God” and also “man’s duty to man.” (Sorry, but the English language doesn’t seem to easily allow for a non-gender specific version of that statement.)

All versions put considerable emphasis on regulating sexual activity (Thou shall not commit adultery and Thou shall not covet thy neighbor’s wife), and all refer to killing, stealing, and lying. But it seems the various religions don’t agree on the meaning of the words. Jewish sources claim that “stealing” refers to kidnapping rather than the stealing of property and most Christians other than Catholics think that “killing” only refers to murder. I guess I’ll have to wait until they come to an agreement before I can write my piece on the ten commandments.

In the meantime, I prefer to be governed by the inscription on the temple to Apollo at Delphi, “Meden Agan - Moderation in all things.” So, I’ll sin in moderation, eat in moderation, drink in moderation, have sex in moderation, etc. Seems like a good plan to me.

And, BTW, here is the late George Carlin on the subject: click here.

Hellerwork and Rolfing

It was 1996 and one day I reached into the back seat of my car to pick up a package. I heard something snap in my shoulder and I felt intense pain. I thought little of it and the pain gradually diminished. However, I noticed an increasing loss of shoulder mobility that continued to the point that I couldn’t raise my right arm above my head and any attempt to do so was very painful. I had torn the rotator cuff in my right shoulder. The standard medical treatment for this so-called “frozen shoulder” condition is some combination of cortisone injections, manually breaking up the adhesions under a general anesthetic, and surgery to cut through the adhesions. I chose none of the above.

Instead, I found a person who is trained in Hellerwork, a deep tissue technique that is aimed at structural integration of the body and a return to normal functioning through gradual release of bound up fascia, the membrane sheath that covers all the muscles and organs of the body. Hellerwork is a modification of Rolfing, which has similar goals. Instead of cutting and tearing, the Hellerworker worked to release the adhesions over a period of several months and I have complete mobility of my shoulder and no ill effects that surgery or cortisone injections might have caused.

You can go online to sites such as The Skeptics Dictionary and read about how bogus the claims for Rolfing are. The writer claims that there is no scientific proof of the benefits of Rolfing. That is probably true, but I would point out that there is likely not to be any scientific proof of the benefits of the cortisone injections and surgery that M.D.s prefer. I would ask what “scientific proof” has to do with human health and good functioning. I don’t need a lot of published research to tell me that my body works better than it did before the treatment. The claims of the strict adherents to what I call the “religion” of science are just as bogus as the statements of alternative practitioners who make inflated claims for their methods. The difference is that the claims of alternative practitioners are regulated by law (they can be sued and put out of business), whereas the statements of the adherents to the religion of science are never subjected to such legal strictures. I don’t need scientific experts to tell me how I feel, or to validate that my 71-year-old body works like that of a person half my age. I know that that is true.

Lightening Up

Today's lead article on Time Goes By (just click on the that name to go there) begins with these statements:

"As of yesterday, according to Gallup, only five percent of Americans hold a positive view of the economy. (They’re probably all hedge fund managers.) Fifteen percent of us have a mixed view and 79 percent think the economy has gone to hell. [It's up to 80% today.]

That’s not exactly how Gallup words it. “Negative” is their mild take, and mine is more polite than I feel. But however you say it, there are few of us who aren’t hurting financially."

She goes on to describe cost cutting measures she is taking in the face of what many believe is the beginning of a major depression. I know we are all seeing the effect of ever-rising prices on our standard of living. It is particularly sobering to those of us who are on relatively fixed incomes that don't keep up with hyperinflation, largely brought on by the increases in gas prices.

Meanwhile, our government is spending billions of dollars in a war in Iraq and big corporations are making record profits. This is the final result of the "trickle down" economics we've been living with. I personally hope that we will see a major change in November, but the effects of these past eight years will take their toll and no new administration can protect us from the brunt of it. In fact, the new administration will be blamed for the pain the current administration has caused.

In the face of all this doom and gloom how can I continue to have fun? It seems almost unpatriotic to be walking around with a smile on my face. Well, the smile on my face costs NOTHING. The price of happiness doesn't go up with the price of gasoline. Yes, we are cutting back on unnecessary expenditures, but the stuff we are cutting out doesn't seem to impact on our happiness. In fact, having sold our second car, selling our house, and selling other stuff we have accumulated just seems to make us feel lighter. Last night Elyn said she had never seen me as happy as I am right now. I am lightening myself up and I'm encouraging myself to enjoy every minute. This is the happiest time of my life so far and it doesn't cost a cent.

Blooming Where You Are Planted

A friend on another of my blogs commented, “Many of us lack the where-with-all to choose another country as if we were ordering off an exotic menu, so bloom where you're planted!” It is certainly true that not everyone can “choose another country” at will. We have been through a period of over ten years when the care needs of Elyn’s father kept us from being able to easily choose to live abroad. His death two years ago and an inheritance that resulted has finally allowed us to consider finishing a time of living abroad that we started in 1997. That 1997 stay in Spain and France was interrupted when both our mother’s had fatal strokes ten days apart and Elyn’s father was in delicate condition for the next nine years. During that period we lived in the US and tried our best to “bloom where we were planted.” That we can contemplate finishing what we started in 1997 is a blessing that results from the situation above and our continuing good health.

A point I want to make here is that I nearly missed taking advantage of this opportunity. When we moved to Santa Fe two years ago I said that I only had “one move left in me.” I was truly feeling old and wanted a place where I could comfortably live out the rest of my life before going into a retirement home. I could have said that I was blooming where I was planted here in Santa Fe, and this town is certainly an attractive town to bloom in. I’ll probably bloom here again some day.

What has changed? What gave me the impetus to say to Elyn, “OK, let’s do it—let’s uproot and do one more big sojourn in the wider world?” The biggest change was a change of attitude. Sure my health has continued to improve here, but the big change happened in my head. I always tell people that my wanderlust comes from having married Elyn, who is nomadic by nature. That is partly true, but I must acknowledge the strides I’ve made in the past year toward realizing that I’m as young right now as I will ever be in this lifetime.

If I can preach for just a minute, I would ask if you are blooming or if you are stuck. You don’t have to go to Europe to bloom, that’s for sure, but I sincerely hope that you are having some fun wherever you are planted.

I designed a business card today and sent it off to the printer. You can see it here. I had a lot of fun designing it just as I’m having fun writing this little piece.

The Staff

I just read a wonderful blog about the advantages of walking staffs over the traditional canes. This is up on Time Goes By (just click to get there). By God, I think I'll go find myself a quarter staff. Doesn't it look cool? Why wait until I need a walking aid?

My one concern is: will the airlines consider it a "weapon" and force me to check it through or discard it? If so, it is blatant age discrimination. I am already objecting on principle. If all of us elders took up the quarter staff we would be a force to reckon with!

The one quote from the article that I liked the best was: "Elders are obligated to give younger people clues about how deep and mysterious elderhood can be."

A Sartorial Note

We men are notoriously unaware of our clothing for the most part. I do know a few guys who are snappy dressers and some of them aren’t even gay. (Don’t write me nasty notes about my insensitivity to sexual orientation—I’ll state right now that I am bisexual.) I grew up in the 1950s, when professional men wore suit and tie to work every day. As a young professor I followed suit (pun intended) until the 1970s, when I yearned for the hippy life and started dressing more casually.

One part of my wardrobe never changed, however—the leather belt around my waist. I can’t say that that leather belt caused my diverticulosis, but it certainly contributed to the pain. Now I never wear anything that doesn’t have some elastic in the waist band. My diverticula still show up when I have a medical examination, but I haven’t had a bout with diverticulitis (infection of the diverticula) in over twelve years. This is just an example of how important it has been for me to be more cognizant of my wardrobe.

I almost never put anything on my body that isn’t a natural material—mostly cotton, silk, and wool. The only exception I make are some travel clothes that need to dry overnight without access to a dryer. My outer clothing is mostly cotton because it wicks moisture, is cool in hot weather and warm enough for most of the winter. I have one type of socks that I like and I own many pairs—all exactly alike. They are light hikers made of wool and silk. I can wear them around the house like slippers and they go with nearly all my shoes and even my hiking boots. For serious hiking I add liner socks.

My one “fashion statement” is my silk underwear. I wear nothing but silk and prefer the model shown in the photograph. No, I don’t look like that guy, but you wouldn’t want to see a photo of me in my skivvies!

If I feel even slightly uncomfortable in any piece of clothing it goes in the Salvation Army bag. I still am unaware of my clothing and I will keep it that way. I count my choice of clothing as a part of my health maintenance program. Its all about freedom from pain, which is a prerequisite for having fun.

Older Bloggers

There are a surprising number of blogs written and maintained by folks my age. If you want to sample some of what is out there I suggest going to a blog called "Time Goes By." Just click on the title and you'll be there. Happy surfing!

Alternatives

Today I am busy shredding paper. Old financial and medical records have piled up gradually over the years and it has been easier to just store them away than to go through them in detail to see what needs to be shredded. Now that we may be moving out of the country for a period of time it doesn’t make sense to pay to store useless paper. I’ve been shredding medical records that go back to the early 1990s. It is a mindless task to look at each piece of paper to see if any significant data, particularly account numbers and social security information are shown. If so, that piece of paper goes into the shredder. Mindless tasks are invitations to reflection as we well know. “The idle mind is the devil’s workshop,” as my mother used to tell me. The devil has always had a fertile ground in my head.

Having handled all that paper at one sitting I have an insight about my health. There is a lot more paper dealing with alternative medical treatment than standard allopathic medicine. That doesn’t surprise me since I have generally avoided Western allopathic medicine as much as possible. I like to think that my current excellent health and relative youth are the direct result of these choices. Perhaps I just have excellent peasant genes and the medical care has little to do with it. But my betting is on my choices of treatment.

I have made many different alternative choices in the past fifteen years and I won’t tout any of them as being miracle cures. But here are some of the choices I’ve made and how I feel about them. As you will see, I’ve had some pretty far out treatments.

I have used the services of chiropractors for most of my life. I can remember that when I was in high school I would get what I called a “stiff neck” where my head would lean to one side and it was very painful to turn my head. I always went to the local bone cruncher and he or she would put me right in a single treatment. Later I would go when my back wasn’t working right and I could get freedom from pain and better flexibility in a few sessions. After the M.D.s fought them for many years, chiropractors have been reluctantly accepted into the standard practice of medicine and their treatments are generally covered by health care plans. I learned a significant lesson in watching these “wars” against what the M.D.s called “quack medicine.” The real war the M.D.s were fighting (and continue to fight) is a war about profit and exclusive access to the money we are all willing to spend to maintain our health. It is a turf battle, pure and simple. A similar battle has been waged by the drug companies, who want to outlaw any medical preparations they don’t make a profit from. Make no mistake about it—when it comes to maintaining our health and well being the medical establishment and the drug companies are not on our side.

Here is a list of some of the alternative treatments I have used in the past fifteen years. In the area of body work I’ve had chiropractic, traditional “Swedish” massage, deep tissue work, erotic massage, Heller work, prostate massage, Rolfing, Phenomenal Touch, cranial sacral work, etc. Among other healing modalities I’ve used tai chi, yoga, rebirthing, holotropic breath work, acupuncture, homeopathy, colonics, herbal medicine, light therapy, sound healing, dance, and movement therapy. In future postings I’ll go more deeply into some of these modalities.

While I’m Still Young

Our conversations these days are often about our plans to uproot ourselves and move to Spain for a few years and do some traveling. On another blog I wrote, “We feel that we need to do the traveling while we are still young, and time's a wasting!” If you know me and how I am in the world you will know that I really enjoy that kind of light banter and irony. (My extra sensory perception hears you say, “Smart ass!” Am I wrong?)

I often find myself to be the eldest person in the circles we move in here in Santa Fe and I’ve taken to inserting that statement into the conversation just to see what kind of rise I get out of the younger generations. Sure it is a joke and it gets a laugh, but here is the truth hidden in it—this very instant, while I’m typing this word, (no, this word), in this instant I am the youngest I will ever be in this lifetime. This instant is the youth of my old age. Viewed from this perspective the statement “while I’m still young” makes perfect sense and is the absolute truth. Consider this for yourself—you are in the youth of whatever part of your life you happen to be in. The question I will ask you to consider is the question I ask myself all the time, “So, this is my current youth—what am I doing with it?”

*****

We were at a party this evening and a man who appears to be roughly my age gave me a wonderful compliment. He said, “I look at you and say ‘there is a happy man.’” What a stroke for my ego! The truth is I am a happy man. When I think about why that is, the answer that comes to me is that I’m happy because I feel totally comfortable living in my own skin, perhaps for the first time in my life. Why? Because I have nothing to hide—my life is an open book (which you can buy and read by clicking here [advertisement]). I have spent years working on congruence, letting all my secrets out. It is just now at age 71 that I feel I’m beginning to get a handle on it. This is who I am, no evasions, no half truths. It is a challenge to live each day this way, but it is my task—along with having fun, of course.

CONSTANTINE'S SWORD

If you want to see a film that truly shows how "the DEAL" I described below has resulted in millions of deaths of innocent people try to find a showing of Constantine's Sword. We just saw it today here in Santa Fe and it is very disturbing. We need this kind of disturbing wakeup call in this country at this time as we move toward a theocracy. (See below)

"CONSTANTINE'S SWORD is the story of James Carroll; a former Catholic priest on a journey to confront his past and uncover the roots of religiously inspired violence and war. His search also reveals a growing scandal involving religious infiltration of the U.S. military and the terrible consequences of religion’s influence on America’s foreign policy."

The Deal

When I begin to talk about fun and death a subject that arises very soon is religion. In my biased opinion our religions are all about regulating fun and avoiding death. Look at the fun side. Go down that list of ten commandments. Do any of them strike you as being fun? Honest now, no one is looking, ever lust after another’s spouse? Ever want to just eat till you pop? How about killing? If you think that killing is never fun take a look at a small boy pulling wings off a butterfly (or any member of the NRA out on the hunt). The prohibitions are all about denying powerful urges. The deal is: if I will just regulate my behavior (thus diminishing my fun) I can avoid death. Good deal? The only catch is that I can’t do it. It is like trying to beat the house at a gambling casino, its a rigged deal—the house always wins. It is a commonplace to hear of the most sanctimonious preachers falling from grace by visiting prostitutes in secret. And how many practice what amounts to stealing? (No, that is just Capitalism, isn’t it?) So religion has a get out of jail free card. I just have to confess my sins and I can still get the prize. But, of course, I won’t know for sure until I—you guessed it—DIE! (And I have this bridge that I’d like to sell you.)

What this looks like to me is a big control scheme. I’m sure that will be no surprise to you. I got that lesson very early on from my Grandfather Call. He was an agnostic and I thought he was the most intelligent man alive when I was a small child. So, I reject the DEAL. Does that mean I’m an atheist and a humanist? Not on your life. I have seen and experienced enough instances in my lifetime of events that can’t be explained by my logic or by the sense data coming in to me, to think that this world as I experience it is all there is. I wouldn’t be at all surprised to wake up some morning and find that I had died—and that I would come to realize it. All the “near death” experiences point in that direction and all the world’s religions speak of continuing life. I have no idea of what that might look like and I don’t believe that any religion or philosophical system has a clear picture of this plane of existence. I’m not ready to buy any of them, but I do reject the DEAL.

It is true that overindulgence in any of those behaviors banned by the ten commandments will cause me grief, but so will overindulgence in any number of non-banned behaviors (try drinking ten gallons of water). I believe in “sin in moderation.” I believe in carefully considering the end result of any action to see if it is ultimately in my best interest. In short, I practice situational ethics. Perhaps this blog will give me the opportunity to deal in greater detail with all those ten commandments. Sounds like fun to me!

Death

OK, so I’ve talked a bit about fun. It’s time to talk about death. One thing that is obvious is that none of us will get out of here alive. We’re all in the same boat. I could list all the euphemisms that we use to avoid the term death, but you know them all. The fact is that, as a culture, we are in denial. That denial extends to me, I’m sure, but I’m determined to look this one in the eye without flinching. I just saw a book on facing death called Staring at the Sun by Irvin D. Yalom. In this book the author suggests that looking straight at one’s own death is like staring at the sun—you can’t do it for very long.

So I’m putting it out here in broad daylight—I’m going to die. I don’t know when or how, but I’m going to die. I search in my being for emotional reactions to this statement. What I feel is a certain inner relaxation—like I’ve finally told the truth and stopped lying to myself and others. I have no death wish. I want to continue having as much fun living on this planet as I can, but the truth is this is just a temporary condition.

Try this on for yourself and see how it feels. I’m interested in your response. I’ve done it for several minutes now and I’m not blinded yet.

Percept Language

Perhaps you noticed the phrase in the next posting, “depressed myself.” This is an example of percept language that I am learning from Jake Eagle. I’m a rank beginner in using it, but it is incredibly empowering because it places all responsibility for how I’m feeling right where it should be. I’ll try to edit my postings to use this language as much as possible. It is a great exercise for me and perhaps you will get used to the unusual constructions.

Having Fun

Having fun is an individual matter. I have fun writing, publishing books, traveling, talking with friends, spending quiet evenings with my beloved, seeing films, eating interesting food, hanging out in the buff at hot springs, and doing tai chi, just to mention a few pursuits that occur to me on the spot. Your list will be very different from mine, but I would encourage you to start making one. Just put things on that occur to you in no particular order. For me, having fun is the primary goal of my life, so it helps to have at least a mental list. At age 71 I could also list things that aren’t fun or aren’t as much fun as they once were. I try to avoid doing those things. I feel I’ve earned the right to avoid what I don’t like. Haven’t you?

I had an interesting experience just about a week ago. Elyn and I were sleeping out in our tent in the back yard since it was a hot night here in Santa Fe, NM. I had some trepidation about the tent, since I have a back that sometimes goes into spasm and the confined space of the tent was enough to set it off. I experienced a few seconds of pain so intense that the world stood still. When the spasm eased I felt a continuing low grade pain that was continuous. As the hours went by I noticed that I began to feel old and fragile. I began to narrow my focus down and try to get comfortable. Thoughts of travel and adventure seemed far in the distance and little by little I began to depress myself. Those feelings were familiar to me and I realized that I had experienced constant low grade pain for several years, but that I had been pain free for many months. When I was in pain, my world was shutting down little by little and when I was pain free it began to open up. My conclusion is that I can’t have fun if I’m depressed, so my job is to do what is necessary to achieve freedom from pain. When and if I can’t achieve that freedom, I’ll do whatever I can to minimize the pain and just realize that I will have a tendency to depress myself when I’m hurting. If I know what my tendency is I can hopefully deal with it and still have some fun. The point will be, perhaps freedom from pain is not something I’ll always be able to achieve, but I am in control of whether I depress myself about it.

The Impetus

I am sitting across from Jake Eagle, our therapist, and talking about having finished Pebbles: Memories of a Small-Town Kansas Boy this week. Jake suggests another writing project that could be fun and might be helpful to others—to write about growing older, maturity, approaching death, sexuality in maturity, and relationships with sons and daughters. He tells me that my attitudes on all these issues may be unique and helpful, which is a big stroke for my ego. I like the idea a lot and begin to think about writing a few notes as I go through this process. This is the first such note.

The thought that comes to me as I drive away from Jake’s place is that I have no credentials to write a “How To” book on growing older. I am not a professional therapist or counsellor. My academic training is entirely in music. My only qualification is that I am growing older and I’m having fun doing it. At age 71 I count that as a qualification of sorts. I have no idea whether my life is of interest or of use to anyone else. I do like the prospect of writing down my feelings and thoughts just to see where they will go.

If you are reading this, you know where they went—into this blog (and maybe into a book one day.)

I am sitting in front of my computer writing this piece. On the monitor is taped a message to myself: “But, will it be FUN?” This is the message I read every day and it pretty much summarizes my approach to life.

Added July 4, 2008. At Jake's suggestion the message on my computer monitor now reads: "But, will I be FUN?" I like it even better!