I had lunch today with two acquaintances from the musician/professor phase of my life. As we talked I repeatedly had to shake the “little grey cells” a bit to bring all of that life back into focus. I can do it, but I certainly would not want to live there ever again. That was a different “me.” My acquaintances are clearly musicians still, he a composer and violist, she a violinist and world-class Suzuki teacher. I really like these folks, but have almost nothing in common with them now. We visited about our lives, our children, our former colleagues, our plans, etc. and it was quite pleasant.
Afterward, I felt somewhat out of focus and disoriented—a little “sea sick.” Coincidentally, their daughter and Elyn’s son are living near LA and they were talking with their daughter about the 5.4 earthquake today in LA as I joined them. It was their daughter’s first California earthquake and she was impressed. Jesse, as a long-time California resident took it all in stride. It occurs to me that the disorientation that I felt is a little like being in an internal earthquake.
It is fascinating to realize how many different people have been "me." I was talking with Elyn about these feelings and she pointed out that I never use the word “I” when referring to the “me” of that time. I never say "how many different people I have been." That would imply that there is an "I" that continues through all these different manifestations. I think I can understand a bit about how it must feel to be a multiple personality and know that other self.
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